It's the end of an era, it's official. One of my best friends - if not THE best friend - I've ever had leaves to begin his life proper in a week or so. As I contemplate this I wonder what the next step is for us all: some of us are off to university; some are getting jobs; myself, I'm in limbo until the Royal Navy decide whether or not I'm good enough to live my dreams.
My ginger-friend; Gwa, the one who is leaving imminantly, we've had some amazing times the past twenty months, highs and lows, points where we doubted our own friendship and the greatest times when we pulled ourselves out of the rutts; there's a reason people always compare us to an old married couple.
Whether it was chess, politics or something less significant, Gwa and I have always found something to argue about. Within six weeks this love of arguments had led us to instate our school's first Debating Society, a passing comment in a rainy english lesson on a friday afternoon quickly became something which would cement our friendship and ultimately identify us as a pair joined at the brain. From debate came chess, lots and lots of chess, learning Gwa was as useless without his bishops as I was without my knights made for much hilarity above the board. As our game developed as did our friendship, next came Youth Speaks, learning our speeches just hours before our performance... we had a good few laughs.
Every day with Gwa is an adventure, in just nine months we went from strangers passing in a hallway to the best of friends. Obviously I cannot vouch for any impact I've left on his life but I can tell you now, with no word of a lie, that without this guy's trust and support I'd never have made it to being the person I am today. He was there in February 2009 when a new girlfriend revolutionised the way I saw and lived my life and left me no choice but to grow up. Later, he was there on the evening of September 2nd when I showed my face for the first time after losing her, he was there throughout my times of sadness and afterwards when my own miserable self-pity hindered everything about me.
The hardest part of our friendship was whn he gave up his A Levels and left school. I have never been so broken as I was when I found out. He later explained that he didn't tell me because he knew how affected I would be by it. I realised soon after that I was wrong in the weeks leading up to his leaving; I pressured him to stay on and finish his A levels without considering how it would make him feel. Gwa's destiny wasn't to be found down the path of formal education, he knew what he had to do and I was trying to stop him. I felt terrible when I realised what I'd done.
We recovered, our friendship stronger than ever before with a new-found understanding of one-another. Settling down at school without my companion was a challenge I nearly failed completely, I hung on for dear life and now I know I'll make it.
Alas I still have this feeling in the back of my mind, a constant nagging saying "he'll be gone soon" with the Peter Pan crocodile alarm-clock ticking away, counting down the seconds and pacing back and forth in my head. In a week Gwa, the man with whom I've spent the past two years of my life, will be gone, away for prolonged periods of time. I always knew the day would come; I've been trying to stop time doing so since July but it has inevitably arrived and; once again, I'm the last to go, still spinning in the juvinile world of Sixth-Form when everyone else of my generation has moved on.
Words cannot describe how scared I am. I know how scared Gwa is, too. But I've got to roll with it. He'll be back to visit soon and I've still got a bunch of amazing friends around me.
I'm sat here staring at the notation I took from the most epic chess match he and I ever had...
My ginger-friend; Gwa, the one who is leaving imminantly, we've had some amazing times the past twenty months, highs and lows, points where we doubted our own friendship and the greatest times when we pulled ourselves out of the rutts; there's a reason people always compare us to an old married couple.
Whether it was chess, politics or something less significant, Gwa and I have always found something to argue about. Within six weeks this love of arguments had led us to instate our school's first Debating Society, a passing comment in a rainy english lesson on a friday afternoon quickly became something which would cement our friendship and ultimately identify us as a pair joined at the brain. From debate came chess, lots and lots of chess, learning Gwa was as useless without his bishops as I was without my knights made for much hilarity above the board. As our game developed as did our friendship, next came Youth Speaks, learning our speeches just hours before our performance... we had a good few laughs.
Every day with Gwa is an adventure, in just nine months we went from strangers passing in a hallway to the best of friends. Obviously I cannot vouch for any impact I've left on his life but I can tell you now, with no word of a lie, that without this guy's trust and support I'd never have made it to being the person I am today. He was there in February 2009 when a new girlfriend revolutionised the way I saw and lived my life and left me no choice but to grow up. Later, he was there on the evening of September 2nd when I showed my face for the first time after losing her, he was there throughout my times of sadness and afterwards when my own miserable self-pity hindered everything about me.
The hardest part of our friendship was whn he gave up his A Levels and left school. I have never been so broken as I was when I found out. He later explained that he didn't tell me because he knew how affected I would be by it. I realised soon after that I was wrong in the weeks leading up to his leaving; I pressured him to stay on and finish his A levels without considering how it would make him feel. Gwa's destiny wasn't to be found down the path of formal education, he knew what he had to do and I was trying to stop him. I felt terrible when I realised what I'd done.
We recovered, our friendship stronger than ever before with a new-found understanding of one-another. Settling down at school without my companion was a challenge I nearly failed completely, I hung on for dear life and now I know I'll make it.
Alas I still have this feeling in the back of my mind, a constant nagging saying "he'll be gone soon" with the Peter Pan crocodile alarm-clock ticking away, counting down the seconds and pacing back and forth in my head. In a week Gwa, the man with whom I've spent the past two years of my life, will be gone, away for prolonged periods of time. I always knew the day would come; I've been trying to stop time doing so since July but it has inevitably arrived and; once again, I'm the last to go, still spinning in the juvinile world of Sixth-Form when everyone else of my generation has moved on.
Words cannot describe how scared I am. I know how scared Gwa is, too. But I've got to roll with it. He'll be back to visit soon and I've still got a bunch of amazing friends around me.
I'm sat here staring at the notation I took from the most epic chess match he and I ever had...
Here's to many more... There will be.
To answer the question in the title: HELL NO this is not the end! Like I said, every day with Gwa is a new adventure, this is the biggest one yet. Bring it on!
Best of luck buddy, I'll be with you wherever your dreams take you. Do it for the good times, the great times and the times we've yet to have.
“Don't be dismayed at goodbyes, a farewell is necessary before you can meet again and meeting again, after moments or lifetimes, is certain for those who are friends.” -- Richard Bach
Alex
Best of luck buddy, I'll be with you wherever your dreams take you. Do it for the good times, the great times and the times we've yet to have.
“Don't be dismayed at goodbyes, a farewell is necessary before you can meet again and meeting again, after moments or lifetimes, is certain for those who are friends.” -- Richard Bach
Alex
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